destitute | { ic information: asgard }

IC INFO;
Character Name: Eliot Waugh.
Canon: The Magicians (TV).
Canon Information: Series overview & character page.
Canon Point: Beginning of season 5.
Age: ~26.
God House: Njord.

Personality:

To those who don't know him very well, Eliot appears to be a very cool, calm, and extremely charismatic individual. He can walk into any room like it belongs to him and if it doesn't, he can quickly take control of it. He's a person who just has that sort of presence; bright, glamorous, and where everything feels effortless and easy. Eliot casts an air of where he can handle anything that comes his way or at least find someone else to take care of it for him. He is unflappable, a master of his own destiny, and his destiny is to party.

Upon arriving to Brakebills, the university where they train young and upcoming magicians how to wield their abilities, Eliot took down his entire discipline's collective GPA by his excessive partying. The dorm for the "physical kids", as it's called, became famous for its outrageous parties and ragers and Eliot was at the head of it. He revels in the attention, standing in the spotlight, and to give everyone such a good time that they always remember his name. It doesn't matter if it's out of love or hate (read: burning jealousy), Eliot enjoys it. He loves the fame and reputation and having his name on everyone's lips.

Eliot also particularly enjoys causing social chaos, whether that's by inviting the worst two people to be in a room together or by accidentally letting a little gossip slip to the right-slash-wrong person and letting the drama unfold. He casts himself as detached, uninvolved with all the peons around him with the clear exception of his very best friend, Margo. If there's anyone in this world that Eliot understands and who understands him, it's her. She's the Queen to his King.

This is who he wants to be known as: the Champagne King.

The problem, of course, is that isn't who Eliot actually is. It's a front that he puts up as a means to protect himself because he doesn't want anyone to see the person he is inside. Eliot hates that person, both from growing up with an abusive and homophobic parent and bigoted community as well as the mistakes of his childhood. One of the defining moments of his life was when he first discovered his magical abilities and accidentally killed one of the schoolmates who had been bullying him. Not only that but he also later turned on the friend who had comforted him during this time and actively took part in his friend's violent bullying.

❝Magic doesn't come from talent, it comes from pain.❞

For Eliot, it's acceptable to hate himself for who he is and what he believes to be his numerous flaws, but it is despicable to hurt someone else. Particularly for the same judgements that he receives himself. The guilt born from this eats away at him, permanently damaging his self esteem and self image because he has to live with the knowledge that he's still a person who did this to other people. He's always going to be someone who killed someone else for selfish reasons and someone who betrayed one of the few friends who understood and stuck by him even going so far as to call him the slurs that Eliot, himself, is afraid of.

With this sort of childhood, it isn't surprising that Eliot has grown up to be a person who doesn't allow people in easily. He makes quips about bonding fast and being someone's friend, but he isn't. Not really. It's only surface level and that's what feels safest to him. He's afraid of intimacy and commitment. If he can keep someone from getting too close, he doesn't have to worry about them eventually being disappointed by getting to know the real him. Nor does he have to worry about the pain of losing them or screwing anything up. It's scary, isn't it? Having something good in your life and then letting it slip through your hands because you couldn't handle it right? People aren't usually worth caring about, he's said before, and you can't lose something that you never had in the first place.

He's pessimistic to fault. Eliot expects for things to go wrong or people to let him down. He's definitely not a "glass half full" kind of guy or someone who will endeavour to look on the bright side of things. Eliot will, instead, throw himself face first into dark thoughts and all the ways that things could fall apart. Nothing matters, everything is bullshit, and you might enjoy what you can before everything goes to hell. It's a self destructive mentality, which has led him down to the path of using parties, alcohol, drugs, and sex as means of burying his difficult feelings. He would rather drink himself stupid than even begin to start navigating through his own misery or grief.

❝Things aren't usually worth caring about.❞

Despite how Eliot may view himself, keenly focused on the negative aspects of his person, he isn't actually a bad person. He's a bright and vibrant person who is uniquely intelligent and cares deeply for the people close to him. He faces even the most difficult and daunting tasks or problems with determination and bravery. When something needs to be done, he doesn't hesitate to make sure that it happens regardless of what that might take from him. Years of his life or his life entirely? Sure. He doesn't even blink. He'll do that for the sake of his friends or the world they live in. Once Eliot gets attached, he gets attached because he feels love and affection for other people powerfully. He's the first person to pay attention and treat them considerately.

He's also one of the first person to be real with someone else. If they need to hear it, Eliot will break the hard truth to them without mincing words just as easily as he will offer a listening ear. He knows what the people around him need and he knows how to provide it for them. It makes him one of the calming and caring friends within his social circle as well as the most dependable. He knows just what he needs to do to pull a friend out of a hole—particularly when he's so familiar with what it's like to get stuck in a hole himself.

At his core, he is soft and gentle. Nothing like who he wants to pretend to be.